How My Great-Great-Grandfather Is Responsible For My Break-Up



Hasmukhlal Kantilal Shah hailed from one of the most hardworking families of the late 19th century, Khangra, a small hamlet situated in the north-east of Gujarat. Having grown up in a joint-family, Hasmukhlal witnessed his parents labour in the semi-fertile fields, yielding crops for the British Raj. Naturally, he took to the fields like fish to water, even before he was a teen. But the young man had a different vision. He was tired of the oppressive British policies. He intended to not only meet their demands but also spare himself enough surplus which he could sell to the general public through the bazaar. Within no time the young farmer became the greatest trader Khangra had ever seen. So much so, the British began respecting him for his efforts of self-sustenance. Such zest for independence in a young man was tough to find in a country ruled over by another. Therefore, Damyanti’s father sought for Hasmukhlal as a potential groom for his daughter. The families met, the marriage was arranged and the couple took vows to love each other, and, be equals.

Along herself, Damyanti brought ample good luck to Hasmukhlal, and her mother’s advice to compromise under all circumstances. While Hasmukhlal’s business flourished, his pride also soared higher. And with that came authority and arrogance. The first to bear the brunt was none other than his own wife. Hasmukhlal’s ever growing ego engulfed his marriage. He never allowed Damyanti to take any part in the business or to leave the house to work in the fields. She wasn’t consulted about any decisions whether business or personal. She wasn’t even allowed to have a say in the number of children she would eventually give birth to. This finally lead to her demise at the age of thirty-six, while delivering her sixth child. Before her last breaths, Damyanti cried her heart out to her eldest daughter, Kasturi. She not only entrusted her with the responsibility of raising the siblings but also gave her an advice she hoped her mother had given her: Adjust, but do not compromise your dignity in the marriage.

Kasturi never had the best of upbringings despite her father having boatloads of cash and a step-mother who took care of the siblings. She was the neglected child since she was the eldest. That never bothered her. What she always dreaded was a fate similar to her mother’s. Her last words haunted Kasturi more than the death itself. Eventually, she was married into a family with connections to the British Royalty, which was a matter of pride for Hasmukhlal. Customs and traditions were a matter of honour in this family. Although her husband wasn’t exactly like her father, Kasturi could see hints of dominance, which she could make do with. But her ill-treatment at the hands of the in-laws was what she could not bear. She was taunted for the most trivial of mistakes and lectured for how she lacked any sophistication. The husband barely took her side and Kasturi always felt a misfit in the glitzy family. She wasn’t spared even in front of Lord Willingdon, who was invited for dinner to celebrate his appointment as the newest Viceroy of India. Kasturi lamented the fact that her mother did not live long enough to guide her through such turmoil. But she wasn’t going to let her own daughter go through what she went through. So, in the winter of 1939, while seeing off her daughter during the vidaai, Kasturi offered Manjushree a golden advice; she requoted her mother’s words, barring the word “adjust”. So, Manjushree left her father’s palace with a car full of sarees, jewellery, a butler and one invaluable piece of advice: Do not compromise your dignity in the marriage.

Now, Manjushree was born with a silver spoon, got all the pampering in the world and received education in law at the Gujarat University. And, her husband was an equal match. Handsome, charming and an avid cricketer. But he had one flaw: Drinking. Having a peg or two, post a session of cricket with his high class Indian and Brit friends, was a ritual for Jeetendra. He would down an entire bottle of whiskey just to win a friendly bet. In an inebriated state, Jeetendra would become a beast. More often than not, Manjushree would be at the receiving end of such behaviour. Even after giving birth to two sons and a daughter, Jeetendra would come home drunk in broad daylight. 15th August, 1947 was just around. While the nation was celebrating its independence, Jeetendra mourned the demise of his friendships as all the Brits returned home. To see her husband frustrated at the lack of recreational activity, Manjushree left her job. But most of her time together was spent in quarrels and literal fist-fights. Ultimately, just like India, Manjushree fought for independence. She divorced the madman and moved to Mumbai where she raised the three children on her own. When it was time to get her daughter, Rupal, married, Manjushree spared her some advice: Do not compromise on anything.

Although Rupal wasn’t as lucky as her mother Manjushree, in terms of having a lavish upbringing, she was equally driven in terms of having a career and independence. After getting a medical degree from the Mumbai University, Rupal practiced pathology for a while. She fell in love with Praful and went on to marry him. This was the first time in the family’s tradition that a woman married someone of her own choice. And what a decision it was! Praful turned out to be the best husband that any of Rupal’s ancestors had ever had. He was supportive of everything and was the calmest person one could meet. Both, husband and wife, worked and lived a happy life until Shweta was born, in 1993. Praful coaxed Rupal to quit her high paying job in order to raise their daughter. Years passed, Praful’s business never reached the heights he had dreamt of, but it was good enough to take care of his wife and two daughters. However, at fifty, Rupal looked back at life and thought she underachieved and neglected her dream. She could not fulfil her wish of becoming a pathology expert. She had to be financially dependent on Praful, which wasn’t always easy. So, before Shweta could even reach a marriageable age, Rupal told her to neither compromise nor let go anything.

Today, at 25, I, Shweta, am just recovering from a bad break-up. I followed my mother’s advice and did not let go my boyfriend’s simple wish of not posting my picture in a mini-skirt on social media. I feared I would go through a similar ordeal my mother and other ancestors went through. This is my third break-up. Every time a man tries to stop me from doing anything, I revolt. I end up doing so even if a man denies me something out of love and care. The rebellious streak in me is a result of the make-up of my DNA. Suppression breeds rebellion. I wish my great-great-grandmother had the courage to revolt. Or, the mothers of all the men which my family’s women met, taught their sons how to treat a woman. Perhaps I wouldn’t be as aggressive as I am today. Perhaps I would still be with the first love of my life. Perhaps I would have learnt to adjust wherever it be right. Perhaps everything would be alright if my great-great-grandfather wasn’t such a douche.


P.S. Khangra is a made-up village. Gujarat University came into existence in 1949, much later than Manjushree could have gone to study law. These liberties have been taken only to give this piece some historic background.

The Whore Who Shall Rock The Cradle


Disclaimer: This blog post comes from a man who has been an advocate of feminism, perhaps more than any other man, or for that matter, woman, has ever been. So please shove the gender bias hullabaloo where it is supposed to be shoved and read on.

Since time immemorial, women have garnered a lot of attention for their suffering at the hands of tyrannical men who have disrespected, used and abused them. A lot has been written and spoken to draw comparisons between the moustache twirling and bicep curling specie with dogs. Agreed, men have barely been a shadow of the typical fairy-tale “prince charming” or “the knight in shining armour”. In fact, one would agree that terming men “dogs” would be an insult to our ever-so-loving and faithful canines. But times have changed and the tables have turned; perhaps not in the right way they should have. This post is not about the damsels in distress; you’ll find loads of those on every second girl’s blasphemous blog. This one’s for the men; an awakening to warn my fellow folks of the ludicrously shambolic state I find today’s women to be in (obviously not all).

So I accidentally stumbled upon the underbelly of social network in the form of an Instagram account which belongs to a “hot and happening” 22 or so, Cancerian Delhiite. This woman’s deep neck cleavage profile picture welcomes the visitors to her mystical world of 100+ filter-laden snaps of – well you guessed it – skin show. Alright, alright boys, calm your pants down! Just a quick little look at the page already revealed the parts of her body which only her parents would’ve seen when she was still a promising little child; or perhaps an ex-boyfriend; in which case, good riddance! A closer look brought to light a picture of the quintessential lipstick smothered vampiresque red pout, so shoddily inviting as if to say, “Come, suck me to death” or maybe even “Come, let me suck to death”. Strategically shot selfies revealed her ill-covered bosoms, and the house mirrors reflected her bare back, all without exposing her face. Commendable photography, I must admit. I also noticed her warmth in attitude towards the 12.2k followers who are occasionally treated with videos of a more exciting variety. A quick boob-squeeze for completion of 5k followers, and a purposeful towel nip-slip for hitting the 10k mark; all captioned lovingly as something like “Thanks for following me. I love you’ll (horrendously misspelled) so much.” Honestly, I can’t wait to see the depths of shamelessness this woman would go to when she acknowledges the completion of further milestones.

“Curiosity is not a sin.... But we should exercise caution with our curiosity…. yes, indeed."

This is one of my all-time favourite quotes (Source: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire). But alas! We human beings…. Always fail to apply our learnings. Perhaps I should have recalled Dumbledore’s words when I was curious to tread further and clicked on the suggested list of more such users. My faith in humanity, especially womanhood, went tumbling down the steep slope of trust when I came across several more vulgar and shocking profiles of teenage and mature women alike. These ladies have even dared to reveal their faces along with their bodies with relentless gusto, basking in the glory of impudence and brazenness, while further entertaining the cheap comments made by class A perverts. And that’s not the end of it all. There are several pages on Instagram, hosted by such perverts, enticing women to share their most intimate pictures on the said pages in the name of “shoutouts”. It actually feels like virtual pimping: admins offering up a collection of some of their finest girls.

The insanity of all this is not just restricted to Instagram or Facebook or Twitter. It has extended to dating apps like Tinder (which is used more for mating). According to a recently published article, Tinder now has more registered women than men. And most of these hook-ups are one-night stands. Then there’s that odd variety of women who end up making-out with random strangers just because they had “one drink too many.” I mean where is all this gonna stop!

Lust, attention, frustration, bad break-ups, deep emotional damage, misguided sense of rebellion or even personal choice; whatever drives these girls to post such pictures and act so irresponsibly, isn’t justifiable. I’m sure most of you are already aware about whatever I’ve written. Many have ignored, and others have accepted this as a part and parcel of the present day living. But I can’t digest it. It bothers me to see the state of women, especially when they are inflicting all this upon themselves. Imagine such women raising your kids! So guys, beware! Choose your partners with a little more scrutiny.

A little gyaan for my female friends reading this post:

If you agree with what I’ve written, make sure to take the responsibility of correcting the wrongs made by your counterparts. Stop your friends or people you know from indulging in such behaviour. Encourage them to be better persons. Because eventually, your children will be going to school with offspring of such women. Respect yourselves and raise the standards of how you perceive yourselves to be. You women deserve much more, much better.


P.S. It is quite possible that jilted ex-lovers share such pictures with these admins as a measure for revenge, which further makes me doubt the whole basis of humanity.

An Open Letter To Parents Around The World




To Parents Around The World,


Hi! Hope you all are doing good. I'm writing this letter to you all hoping to find a few answers about the genesis of the idea of parenthood. I may come across as cold, arrogant, harsh, rude and probably even worthy of a death sentence, in your eyes (okay.... now that was melodramatic!). But all I seek to know is this: Why Did You Have Kids?

Before writing this letter, I already asked a few set of parents about their views on this topic. Thought I would get quick and equivocal responses. But it was just a lot of 'ummms' and 'ohhhs'; the kind of clueless attitude you associate with an engineering student thinking why he chose to be an engineer in the first place. The replies that I got, after the most dramatic of pauses, were pretty astounding. 

A set of parents told me they wanted to extend their bloodline (speaking literally as if they belonged to the most regal race, but having assets less than that of an average Indian family); hence their shot at having kids. Their first child was a female, which didn't serve the purpose. And so they "had to" try for a second child. But to their horror (in the truest sense), they were blessed, or rather cursed, with another daughter. Thankfully for mankind, they stopped pursuing. But what about the bloodline now? Who is to take the family name forward? Did having two children even serve their purpose? Few other determined (or shall I say stubborn?) couples did get the desired son in the third/fourth attempt. But I wonder if they ever considered the monetary aspect of raising three to four children. Wouldn't it be more prudent to have just one daughter and raise her like a princess rather than having four children who'd probably live lives of deprivation. 

That reminds me of the opposite kind; parents who have butt-loads of cash, overflowing bank accounts, and lockers full of glittering jewelry. One such pair wanted an "heir" and not exactly a son, to look after their catalog of properties and multiple syndicates. Why don't such people consider being generous and donate their cash reserves to orphanages. Or even better; why not adopt an orphan? 

I happily pardoned the above set of parents once I heard this unbelievable and funny reply: "Our son was a MISTAKE!" Haha! Poor guy! If he learns about this, he'd perhaps commit suicide or murder (depending on his inclination to GTA, of course :P) I mean seriously? A mistake? Nevermind. Forgive the parents. 

The following lot shall put the former to shame. The husband was not interested in having a child due to financial constraints, but had to go for one just to prove his masculinity. That was his reason to reproduce. I mean what?! Is that even considered as a proof of one's masculinity? I think a solid stand in favour of women empowerment would have been far more credible. Isn't this insanity? 

Now to the "less shocking" answers:

"We just wanted someone to take care of us when we grow older." Ever heard of maids? Caretakers?

"We wanted a kid to add something interesting to our average and mundane married life." I guess a PlayStation or some health club membership would be a wiser investment. How about a foreign tour to an exotic locale? That would do the trick at 1/1000th of investment required to raise a child, and cause minimum hassle.
  
Some also mentioned that they wanted a bundle of joy around. To those, I'd suggest a pug or Pomeranian. Pets follow orders, never argue and always be loyal. Much better than kids!

Some said they had kids just because everyone does that; it's the next step post-marriage. Some conceded to their ageing parents' want to have a grandchild to play with, in their ending years.

My best friend told me that even in ancient Indian scriptures children are considered a gateway to heaven. It is believed that ancestors and parents themselves, would go to heaven only if the child performed the last rites. This is why people had children in ancient India. Terrible!

No one, not a single person mentioned to me what should be the most genuine reason: That it just came naturally to them to have a child whom they wished to love unconditionally. 

Look, I'm not trying to judge you guys here. But I seek to know why have kids? What's the thought behind it, if there is any? Maybe I met the wrong set of people (they're all educated and belong to good families, by the way). But with responses such as above, I think people take it as an activity just like any other, which has no proper reason behind it. It's like wanting a car just because your neighbour has one.  

Wouldn't you, wife and husband, be better off spending the rest of your lives loving each other without having to share your love, time and money with a third person? I say so because you lot end up cribbing about sacrificing your lives for your children, later in the future. There are couples who have claimed to have fights and lack of love after having a child. Umpteen cases are known where parents get debt ridden to just give their children great lives. A wife who has tremors in her marriage, condemns the traits in her child similar to that of her husband's and in-laws'. Why? Just because you no longer love the person with whom you spent more than half your life, you can't see your child possess the same traits, and end up hating him/her? What's his/her mistake? 

So my point is, is it worthy to have children with a selfish/no reason and mess up your lives? Do such parents actually love their children unconditionally? To this, my answer is an absolute NO! No, I'm not crazy. It's just what I've observed over the 25 years of my life. And I suppose, as children of your parents, you too would be able to relate to it. 

The moment a child is born, he or she is monitored for every action. Shaping a child's life is different; but controlling it is awful. Think about parents who want their children to become doctors or pilots just because of their own failed ambitions and incomplete dreams. Or even worse; just so that society accepts the child as successful. Right from the day a child starts to grasp things, he or she is "expected" to follow certain principles and abide by protocols which the parents feel are right and important for the child's future. And if the child fails to do so, he or she is threatened or punished. A mother allows her child to watch television only if he/she finishes homework. I understand it is all done with a view to make a child responsible, shape his/her personality and help him/her become a nicer person. Parents draw from their own experiences and guide their children in becoming better individuals. But that's what it should be.... GUIDING! Not controlling! Throughout their lives you parents tell your children, "do this" or "don't do this", and show disappointment if they fail to meet your expectations. For you all, it's like creating droids, who must talk, walk and live their lives just as their creators want them to.
  
The problem is, you parents fail to accept the difference between the expected, ideal version of the child you'd dreamt of, and the actual true person your child has grown up to be. Hence it naturally causes you to fail at loving your children, unconditionally. It's so ironic that in the horde of creating ideal children, you fail to become ideal parents. Isn't the most ideal thing for a parent to accept the child for who he or she has grown up to be and then, if not fully support, at least accept and continue to love him/her unconditionally? That is the only thing a child wants, trust me! Thank God for blessing me with parents who love me with all my faults, unconditionally.

So tell me, folks; what was your intention behind giving life to your offsprings? Are you one of those I've mentioned above? Be true to yourselves, cross your hearts and ask if you truly love your child unconditionally the way he/she is. Or do you have regrets about having children? I hope I've put across my points without being too preachy. Pardon me for hurting your sentiments, if I have, but I'm just in search of an answer as to why have children; as at some point in the future I too shall be at a stage where I would want to take the decision of whether to have my own child or not. 

Regards,

A Curious Child


P.S. Even if you aren't a parent and reading this, do ask your parents why they chose to have you, and let me know in the comments section. Be truthful. If you're hesitant, just mention whether your parents belong to the type of parents I've mentioned or they are the ideal ones. Even I've asked mine, and don't mind sharing that with you all. 

Phir Kyun?


This is my first ever attempt at poetry, and that too in Hindi. Although I'm not sure if it even qualifies for a poetry! 

The first four stanzas refer to the Mind, Eyes, Lips and Heart, respectively; and the last one is the Conclusion! 




Chhoti-moti, har kism ki baatein meri yaad rehti hain usey,
Kehti hai ki meri yaadein sataati hain usey!
Phir kyun uski kahi har baat ko main bhool jaata hoon,
Kyun meri yaadon mein use dhoondh nahin pata hoon?

Aankhon se apne woh duniya ka har rang mujhe dikhaati hai,
Uski putliyaan jaise ke kuchh mujhse kehna chaahti hain!
Phir kyun nahin padh paata main un baaton ke matlab ko,
Kyun nahin dekh paata un aankhon mein chhupe dard ko?

Uske hothon par har pal ek pyaari si hansi hoti hai,
Uski baaton se hameshaa mujhe khushi milti hai!
Phir kyun nahin alfaaz nikalte uski tareef ke liye,
Kyun chup reh jaata hoon main bina koshish kiye?

Mera naam sunne se woh ek dhadkan chuk jaati hai,
Kehti hai, ‘Yeh toh har roz ka haal hai!’
Phir kyun hoti hai mushkil use apne dil mein basane se,
Kyun ghabrata hai dil mera use pyaar karne se?

Darr lagta hai mujhe ki kahin main use kho na doon,
Uska pyaar bhara dil galati se tod na doon!
Aata nahin mujhe apne jazbaaton ko bayaan karna,
Shaayad isi liye uske hotey hue bhi main akela hoon!




Would love to know what you think of it! 


The Shell

On a cool breezy afternoon, I dragged myself out of the house and got behind the steering of my small red car, to go to the gym. I took the shortest route to reach my destination, windows of the car rolled down. On the way an old acquaintance noticed me and shouted my name out. I stopped the vehicle. The friend came over from the other side of the road and greeted me, heartily. We struck an immediate conversation, although I didn’t get down from the car. The smile on his face widened with each memory about the past, but I remained passive during most parts of the chit chat. Soon he realised my lack of interest and withdrew himself, gently. He waved goodbye and I drove ahead, rolling the windows down.

After the workout, drenched in sweat, I got back into the car, kept the windows open, again. As I drove past a departmental store, I saw my distant cousin getting out of it. I guess she noticed me, (perhaps hoping for a lift or maybe just a small conversation) but I pretended to not have seen her, and continued to drive. Having no intensions of returning home early, I opted to take the longer route. I shut the windows, put on the air conditioner and the car tape, and started humming as I passed a few concrete structures. I kept shuffling songs on the stereo while I stopped at the signal waiting for the light to go green. Just then, a familiar girl strode past on the right. She was my muse, my secret love interest (whom I hadn’t met in ages), and wondered whether I could talk to her. She seemed to be in no hurry to walk, and as the light went green I was almost parallel to her, driving slow along the footpath. I could’ve stopped but didn’t, and reluctantly sped up. Despite the fact that my home was just a couple of kilometres away, the way back felt long, and lonesome. And just then, I caught sight of a wretched man, a bottle of alcohol in one of his hands, and a dagger in the other, chasing another man from across the road. The man with the weapon splinched the second man’s arm and stabbed a blow on the chest. He took off, and the wounded man collapsed just about 3 feet away from my vehicle. Once again I did not get down off the small red car, and just like before, drove away, leaving the man to breathe his last.

As I reached home, I felt suffocated. I felt uneasy and just lied on the bed. It dawned upon me that all the events that had occurred on the way to the gym and back, had an emotional bearing on me. I felt angry for being uninterested while talking to my old friend, felt sad for not helping my cousin by being lazy, felt hopeless for not talking to my love interest because of hesitation and felt shameful for not getting down to help the wounded man because of fear. All this just because I did not get out of my small red car, my shell.

This is what we do majority of times; repent for something which we could’ve done had we come out of our shells. Fear, hesitation, doubt, laziness all of these make us get into the shell and situations worsen as time passes. I guess it’s prudent to face a situation the very first time so that the next time we’re armed and alert to deal with things in a better way, just like before. 

Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows – Part 1 (Analysed)


-------------------------------------Contains Spoilers-------------------------------------------


Well I wouldn’t bother to mention the story here as the whole world by now knows what the film is all about. However, for those who haven’t read the books, this part 1 of the epic finale is about how the trio of Harry, Ron and Hermione leave their comfort zones and set out on the hunt for the Horcruxes (things in which Voldemort has concealed a parts of his soul). During their journey they face all kinds of challenges, emotional as well as dangerous, and also learn about the tale of the Deathly Hallows.

Now let me get straight to the point. The film sets the dark tone right from the word ‘go’; this perhaps is the darkest film in the series. David Yates and Steve Kloves have tried to be absolutely faithful to the book and they succeed to do so with all the major sequences present in the film almost ditto to the book. This is the first brownie point for the duo. The telling is a little different from the rest of the Potter films though, as this time Hogwarts is nowhere in the scheme of things. The film cannot be assessed completely, I believe, as it’s not complete, not even in itself. Thus I think it’d be only fair to assess the whole of Deathly Hallows Parts 1 and 2, combined. However, this is my take on what I felt about DH-Part 1.

Acting: The film fully belongs to the trio. The young brigade’s hard work shows; particularly Rupert Grint, who plays Ron with complete élan. Dan, Rupert and Emma prove that they’re capable of lifting the burden of the entire film on their young shoulders. They manage to grab eyeballs even when only one of them is on screen. They’ve done a marvelous job and this is the best combined effort of the three, by far. Other notable performances are that of Helena Bonham Carter as the nasty Bellatrix Lestrange (she’s superb at belittling), and the menacing Dark Lord (Ralph Fiennes).

Cinematography: Eduardo Serra had a greater challenge on hand than the past cinematographers of the series as this time majority of the action happens in the exteriors. The Portuguese has taken some exceptional shots involving landscapes, barren lands and woods. He’s done a great job especially in the Malfoy Manor and Godric’s Hollow scenes. Some of the shaky cam shots are brilliant.

Music: I for one didn’t quite like Alexandre Desplat’s music; perhaps I was too engrossed in the telling and the visuals. But I can surely say there’s nothing extraordinary about it. However, the very first soundtrack, Obliviate, is a gem. 

Editing: Mark Day has done a fine job by cutting the scenes at crucial points where the telling becomes more than effective. It’s contemporary and gives the feel of edginess and anxiety.

Screenplay:  Steve Kloves has woven the most important and intriguing situations and detailed them so well that you live virtually every moment of it and yet do not get even a wee bit bored. The scenes are weighed so perfectly in all terms that the film doesn’t falter anywhere; you get a full dose of every genre.

Direction: There could’ve been no other better director than David Yates to direct this one; simply because of two strong reasons. 1) He’s a master when it comes to emotions, which is the most important factor in DH-Part 1 with the trio put in all sorts of situations. And 2) Because he’s already worked with the cast in OOTP and HBP, therefore he knows exactly what could be extracted from each individual. Besides, his take on the majority of the sequences is untainted and enriching. This one is a class act by Yates.

Highlights
1.      They’ve shown Hermione’s house for the first time.
2.      All the Death Eaters at the table.
3.      Fred and George’s short but effective comic relief.
4.      The entire Ministry of Magic sequence involving the trio.
5.      Harry and Ron’s fight.
6.      The Harry and Hermione dance in the absence of Ron.
7.      Destroying the locket.
8.      The Tale of Three Brothers visuals and narration.
9.      Dobby (A tear trickled down my cheek when he died).
10.  Malfoy Manor confrontation.

Lows
1.      The aerial fight in the 7 Potters scene could’ve been better.
2.      Voldemort missing from the Bathilda Bagshot/ Nagini scene at Godric’s Hollow.
3.      Mad Eye’s death has been given no significance. (I hope Snape has a better death)
4.      Pettigrew doesn’t die, forget the silver hand.
5.      None of the Order members appear ever again, after the trio leaves the burrow.

However, I feel these lows are too weak to shatter the greatness of this epic. In short, Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows – Part 1 is spectacular and full of entertainment good enough to keep you at the edge of your seats and your eyes glued to the big screen for the 142 minutes. It’s worth watching twice and even thrice. On a second thought, how about 7 times!!!!

Toying With Love

I was seated in the comfort of my chair, and was sipping on some hot coffee from my favourite blue mug, as it showered heavily outside. I looked out through the window and noticed a couple walk by, cuddling, under a rainbow coloured umbrella, which I assume belonged to the feminine. I felt butterflies in my stomach. It was the ideal romantic evening, the one on which you’d like to go out for a long drive with your loved one, romantic Bollywood numbers playing on your car stereo, or perhaps a long walk on a deserted beach. Since I wasn’t fortunate enough to do any of that, I resorted to my sofa and took another sip of the piping hot coffee. Curled up, I pressed the remote button and put on the TV. I couldn’t find anything appealing and kept flipping the channels until a reality show caught my attention.

Emotional Atyachar on UTV’s Bindaas, is a show based on testing the fidelity of the concerned. The show goes like this…. A committed person (Lead) approaches the channel to do a so called Loyalty Test on his/her better half (Suspect). The channel keeps a tag on the Suspect and his/her activities with the help of the latest, technologically advanced hidden cameras, after setting up a co-incidental meeting between him/her and an Undercover Agent . This Undercover Agent, a person from the opposite sex, is employed by the channel to strike a bond with the Suspect and lure him/her. The cameras cover the journey from persuasion to the start of a new relationship over a period of six days, during which the Suspect’s lewd character is revealed. On the sixth day, the Lead is called to the studios and is shown all the six days’ footage by the anchor. Thus, the Lead assesses the Suspect’s trustworthiness on the basis of the recorded footage. Generally, the Lead ends up drenched in tears, or on a furious high, till he/she reaches the sixth day’s footage. At this point the Lead is shown the live footage of the Suspect and the Undercover Agent, and is taken immediately to that place for confrontation.  

The Lead launches a war of (swear) words, sometimes even a physical combat, with the Suspect, and the two end their relationship. All of this, on national television.
This show, since its commencement, has been a topic of debate for more than one reason. Many have ridiculed the vulgarity aspect, while some have written about the unauthorised access to the Suspect’s life. I’ve also read and seen views questioning the show’s authenticity and degree of genuineness. Agreed, most of these aspects need to be considered from several viewpoints. However, these things do not matter much when we see the larger picture (which many have failed to address); and no, the larger picture isn’t about saving one’s life from a hell bent rogue. It’s about spreading negativity and encouraging skepticism, especially amongst the youth, towards love and relationships.

Every other day, we see, read or hear about a case of disloyalty, broken relationships and even divorces. Many years ago these things were pretty uncommon and perhaps even unheard of. I know times have changed and people have learnt to move on for good, but this shift has also brought unwelcomed changes. One of them is the drop in people’s tolerance levels. What once was considered a great virtue is now rarely found in the present generation and its scheme of things.  

We are living in mad times where break ups are happening at an alarming rate, and life of solitariness is a road to grief.I know the participants of such television shows typically hail from the ‘not so good’ families, or have inferior moral standards. But there are also some who take such a stern step out of sheer helplessness or depression. Besides, these shows also unfold the truth and the partakers get some sort of justice. Celebrities have also started making appearances on shows like Emotional Atyachar. Thus, anyone could get tempted to go on the show. Which is why I think something that instills faith, especially in love, and spreads the positivity of a relationship at a mass level, should be aired rather than shows which glorify tales of infidelity and lead to suspicion, particularly now when we relationships are falling apart. This might help reduce the distrust among people and they might soon again start believing in the power of love and relationships.

Think about it and let me know if you think likewise or otherwise. Love you all unconditionally.

Film Review - Inception

Following, Memento, Insomnia, Batman Begins, The Prestige and, The Dark Knight; after you make such mind boggling films which are a combination of fantastic complex cinema and breathtaking entertainment, the audience expects something even better, and you’re bound to end up scratching your head, running short of ideas. But, Christopher Nolan is one such man whose excellence has no boundaries; his creativity never seems to drain out.

It all starts at a sea shore. Dom Cobb (Leonardo Di Caprio), is found unconscious by an armed guard, who takes him to a rich, elderly man’s chamber. The old man recognises Cobb at once but Cobb does not. Next, we know that Dom Cobb is a skilled thief, the absolute best in the dangerous art of extraction, stealing valuable secrets from deep within the subconscious during the dream state. He and his friend Arthur (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) are assigned by a company in England to extract secrets from a Japanese bigwig, Saito’s (Ken Watanabe) mind. It turns out that Saito knew about Cobb’s plans and was in turn auditioning the team for his own mission. He offers Cobb a one last job, against a competitor company inherited by Robert Fischer (Cillian Murphy), this time creating the whole idea and dream, known as Inception. The reward: Lots of money and a clean chit for Cobb to go back to the US, as he is not allowed to enter the nation (reason revealed later in the film). So Cobb now starts assembling a team along with Arthur. He recruits a new architect, a student named Ariadne (Ellen Page), who creates the dream world architecture. Then, Eames (Tom Hardy), a forger who can shift his identity inside the dream, and, Yusuf (Dileep Rao), a chemist who formulates the sedatives needed to enter the dream world. Throughout the recruitment process, the rules of entering the dream world, surviving there and coming out are explained. The main plot is about how this team tries to enter Fischer’s mind and if they succeed in their heist.

If you found this story exciting and complex, it is just 10% of the entire film. Inception is full of surprises right from the beginning, one of them is the subtitles, which I think the Indian distributors wanted to incorporate not because of the varied accents but they wanted the Indian audience not to miss out on even the minutest details. The build up to each stage of the film is fascinating. The cast is awesome throughout, especially Leonardo Di Caprio and Ellen Page. Although, Marion Cotillard’s character Mal (Cobb’s wife) has not got a great scope in the film, she’s done well. The high scale cinematography is stunning, while the editing is crisp and sharp. And the background score adds a cherry on the top. But the main hero of the film is the Inceptor of the idea, the film’s creator, Christopher Nolan. His storytelling is compelling and innovative to the core. He has weaved the magic of this dream world in the most believable manner almost effortlessly, combining visual extravaganza with intellectual brilliance. Writing something like this is challenging, and executing it is more so; but Nolan's done it with ease. There are some sequences in the film that he has designed simply to sweep people off their feet. That this man is the best filmmaker today, is incontrovertible.

Inception is a treat for those who love their minds to be questioned by the filmmaker, those who love to be involved right from the first frame of the film, and those who are ardent fans of the sci-fi/thriller/mystery/action genres. You really wouldn’t want to watch this one with a lover. Please don’t watch if you thought you could keep your brains locked at home and enjoy. The only loophole in the film is the interval which is like a speed-breaker that spoils your 300 kmph drive on the expressway. They should screen this one without an interval.

Certainly the best movie of the decade contender followed by The Dark Knight. For me, it’s way better than Avatar, as Cameron took a 12-13 years long break before he came out with the 3D spectacle with a less interesting story. With Nolan, it was just a matter of exactly 2 years to make this flawless film. This one's beyond the reach of our film industry. Hail Christopher Nolan!!!!

Rating: 5/5

Film Review - Prince: It's Showtime

Warning: Contains some innocuous spoilers

This week was sort of a comeback week. I’m making a comeback to The Intellectual Kiosk after exactly a month, Shoaib Malik and his would be wife Sania Mirza, were back to the front pages of the tabloids and caught all the eyeballs certainly for reasons other than their sporting proficiencies (have doubts about Ms. Mirza’s proficiency though), and a certain Mr. Viveik Oberoi made a colossal comeback to the silver screen as the solo lead, and how.

Well, the story (haha) of Prince begins at a huge diamond corporation (in Hiranandani), Mumbai. The so called world’s best, an international thief, Prince (Viveik Oberoi), breaks in, and with the help of his friends (who’re outside the building in a van with all the fancy gadgetry), steals several diamonds. All of this, in the Minority Report and Mission Impossible style. Next we see newspaper flashes of various heists in different parts of the world. (This is how our hero is an international thief) And there comes O Mere Khuda! with titles. Next, we go 3 months ahead in time and we see some super locations of Durban, South Africa, and amidst a beautiful countryside scenery is an exotic villa in which the same Prince is lying on the bed (wish he never got up). His irritating servant tells him how he got there but our hero remembers not even a bit. There he goes trying to gather every bit of vital information that could lead him to his real identity and reveal the deadly secrets (LOL). Prince comes across 3 women (Niroo Bajwa/ Nandana Sen/Aruna Shields), all of whom claim to be Maya, his girlfriend. The CBI, lead by Sanjay Kapoor, is after him; the IGRIP (Indian Government Research and Protocol), lead by Dalip Tahil is after him; the 3 women are after him and so is the villain (some Mimoh look alike) (Soon the distributors and the audiences will be after him, too). We gain the ‘essential’ knowledge that they are chasing him in order to fetch a 3,000 years old ancient Sri Lankan coin, (which he stole as an antique) within which is concealed a chip which our Indian scientists made after 8 painstaking years. The chip, capable of erasing and reloading memory from human brain is the reason behind Prince’s loss of memory (wish I had a similar chip to erase my memory of watching Prince). In the rest of the movie we see thousands of bullets being fired collectively but none piercing the hero, parachutes and gliders moving around seamlessly (wonder how each time these characters managed to land with utter perfection), crashing cars and idiotic chase sequences. I wouldn’t even like to admit what happens in the end. The most irritating thing in the film is when the cast keeps uttering the film's tagline : It's Showtime.

The fact is that the makers gathered every possible failure from the industry, stuffed them in an attractive package and delivered the same with no shame. The makers right from the start assume that the viewers are outright dim wits and they could be fooled at every stage of storytelling. Viveik Oberoi has perhaps made the biggest mistake by signing this lucrative big budget film with a view to rise from the ashes. He was better off doing meaningful roles in a multi starrer. What can I say about the 3 women! Believe me; if any of the actresses (I’d like to call them something belittling but will have to observe my niceties) had a shred of self respect they would have rejected the roles first time they got the offer. All of them have nothing to do except creating some doubt in the minds of the viewers (that’s what the makers tried unsuccessfully), dance around in cheesy skimpy attire, and look foolish. Neeru Bajwa would regret quitting television soaps as she looks nothing more than an ugly oaf in this film. Nandana Sen is the curvaceous who is tattooed all over the body. As for Aruna Shields, she needs to work on her Hindi, her acting and be prepared to dub her own dialogues, then think of even signing a film. Total waste all of them. I think it would not even interest you to know how the rest of the cast has performed.

This one is a total waste of time, money, energy and perhaps even careers. A cheap attempt to make an action/thriller, a 2nd grade Hollywood action/thriller is a much better option than this one. I care less to split the review into the various aspects of film making as I had done for MNIK because there is not even a single point that acts as the saving grace. I would not be surprised to find everyone associated with the film muttering O Mere Khuda, Haadsa Ye Na Jaane Kab Hua!

And why I cared to write this review in the 1st place is because I wanted to save all of you, my loved ones, from experiencing something as atrocious. My friend Dhaval dozed off twice and was ready to leave in the interval. There were merely 25-30 people who had come to watch the show, and on a Saturday afternoon that is a poor number. Things are bound to get worse in the coming days. I hope after reading all this you shall not dare go to the theatres and if you still possess the courage then all the best. Bhagwan aapko bachaye.

Rating: 1.5/5

P.S.: Adi, once again I've written a review but I've saved you the pain of watching a horrendous film like Prince.

Hypo-Crisis





The following content might not be suitable for individuals below 18. Kindly read only if you are matured.

Welcome to India, the land of diverse cultures and religions, a country that basks in the glory of centuries of rich heritage and ancient traditions. Many foreign nations speak greatly about India and its diverse population, which we consider as a great asset. Over the years, we have been bragging about righteous living, be it Hindus, Muslims, Sikhs or Christians; those who believe in God and even the agnostics and atheists. We abstain from all vices and hate those who indulge in them, very good. We always have portrayed that we are the most simple, rooted and above all, moral and god fearing. However, there is something that bothers me about us Indians. I have a few agendas about the integrity of the very same citizens who claim to be righteously sane.

Almost every other day one or the other tabloid crops up with an article about an Indian beaten up in Australia and about the issues highlighted by racism in the rest of the world. Our activists thrive on these incidences and express trepidation; nothing wrong. But, have we given thought to our own racist conduct. Whenever parents go for potential bride/bridegroom hunting for their sons/daughters, majority of them have strong preferences, and one of them on the priority list is the preference of having a fair and bright skin prospect. And the most shocking thing is the very same society speaks ill of racism and bids for colour equality.

Sex and relationships is my absolute favourite as a topic to ponder on when it comes to Indian thoughts and practices about the same, and this is the primary reason why I am posting after a month. Dating is considered as a sin by a few and living in as a crime by most. People always think ill when they see a lad and girl hanging out together and then they say a boy and girl can never be ‘only friends’. Such great opposition against all of that whereas the same school is seen involved in extra-marital affairs and having a horrid past of multiple flings. Countless say they cannot bear the openness shown on television, and blame the media and actors for skin show, and banish such programs that they think are detrimental to the society on the whole. But the very same people are the most loyal clients of the porn industry. And the worse is to come.

My friend had once mentioned that the internet chat rooms of the most famous internet service provider are a fun place to visit. Just out of curiosity I tried it myself months back and found them rather odd. However, the curiosity of exploration pulled me in, so I went into one of the chatrooms some 25 days back after creating a different e-mail address and a fake identity. What I saw was completely shocking and bizarre. Just as I entered one of the Mumbai chatrooms, a host of people flooded my window with their IMs (Instant Messages), most of who seemed to be very friendly. However, just a 2 line conversation brought into light that they were looking for something beyond a casual chat or even friendship. Since my e-mail id is not gender suggestive they hoped that I was a female. There is this common procedure that I observed, they ask for ASL (Age/Sex/Location) and once I revealed that I am a male, several of them vanished with just a plain bye or even without a reply. However, a few remained and urged me to talk to them, either something raunchy or more straight-forwardly, they just reintroduced themselves as gays. Not only them, I also came across two transgenders and even bisexuals, some of them who offered online sex, while others were creatively putting forward a proposal of having a sexual encounter at their places, addresses of which they flashed in the open in the chatrooms. And this time I vanished too. I completely understand their urges as they are always looked down upon and completely chucked out of the society. Thus, they sought for the interested ones at such portals as they have nowhere to go. However, it was the behaviour of the straights that literally shook me. Men, and even women, openly offered such encounters, flashing their addresses and numbers. Some introduced themselves as housewives and uncles too, while some were college going teens. Hoards of working professionals also form a big participating group in there. I honestly did not want to speak to them but to know them I had to become one of them. Some women were nothing less than shameless and a disgrace, while a few others made me proud of them, as they refrained from involving in such a conversation. Some instances are so shocking that putting them in here will be inappropriate. After all this exploration and 15 odd nights of sheer filth and dirt I discovered that we are a society which has something on the face of it and is completely different from the inside. They operate on a portal where no one can identify them. Contrary to one of the most famous superheroes, Batman, they are fine in broad daylight and filth by night. And this is what aggravates me as the very same society curses the west for their so called offensive lifestyle. However, I find us at fault because the western nations have never claimed to be outright good. They portray what they are whereas I feel our country masks its underbelly and boasts about the traditions and culture, still clinging on the glory of the past.

There are several other things of this nature that one could see each day. Madhur Bhandarkar’s Page 3 is a first-rate example. But all this is not class specific, happens at every stratum of society. Everything clearly highlights our hypocrisy, double standards, two-facedness and duplicity. All this might seem to be familiar because it has been there since ages. It cannot be overlooked though as it is more of a crisis situation.

I think we need a serious dose of introspection and self assessment. Before pointing fingers at others, we need to look within and clean the dirt. Not all but many indulge in the very same vices for which they defame other nations. How is that logical? The demons do persist in each society, and it is difficult to wipe them off completely, but then one should have a clear conscience to blame others. After all, this is what is taught at school, isn’t it? I am a complete patriot and do not think ill of our country but when it comes to veracity, I think we need to be honest and truthful. That is when we shall truly be in a position to sing our own praises. What say, Youngistaan?

Film Review - My Name Is Khan

Well my friend Aditya Tibrewala is very good at writing reviews and has been posting quite a few on his blog but since I love SRK and this film touched me, I could least restrain myself from the enticement of writing my own review.

Rizwan Khan (Shahrukh Khan), suffering from a disorder, leaves India to settle with his brother (Jimmy Shergill) in San Francisco after his beloved mother’s (Zarina Wahab) death who taught him that there are two kind of people in the world, good and bad, and they do not have a religion. Unaware about his disorder’s precise details, Khan’s sister-in-law (Sonia Jehan) finds out the reason behind his plight and discovers that he suffers from Asperger’s syndrome, a state of Autism, in which the patient has a disorder of neural development characterised by impaired social interaction and communication, and by restricted and recurring behaviour. He cannot tolerate loud sounds, and gets startled on seeing strong yellows. Rizwan works as a salesman for his brother’s company selling beauty products and comes across a salon employee and single mother, Mandira (Kajol Devgn), to whom he tries to sell the products with great honesty and inherent innocence. Mandira and Khan fall in love with each other, and the mother and son duo accept Khan with his ailment with open arms. The 9/11 debacle shatters the state of Muslims in the US. Inevitably, an unfortunate event occurs in the life of the Khan family and thus Khan sets out on a journey to meet the President. During his entire journey he meets some evil and some good people. The essence of the film is that despite suffering from a disorder it seems that Khan is saner than others, that goodness always prevails over the bad.

Story & Screenplay: First things first, the story seems to be clichéd and boring with a handicapped protagonist and the 9/11 backdrop, however the treatment of this film is entirely different than what other Indian films of this genre have been like. Shibani Bathija’s script has allegorical references and balanced characters. The entire Wilhelmina sequence in Georgia is written well (except for the rescue scene), and SRK’s character is well sketched.

Direction: Karan Johar has gone a step further than his usual style of storytelling which involves a heavy dose of romance, dance, songs and melodrama, most of which is missing in this one. He is triumphant in this attempt to make serious cinema. There are several sequences that he has taken care of perfectly well, especially Wilhelmina. You shall not say this is a signature Karan Johar film except for the hurricane rescue sequence. He has used his actors perfectly well and has got the best out of the Shahrukh-Kajol pair. KJo’s love for the USA is pretty evident through fine detailing.

Acting: Well what can I say about SRK! This perhaps is Shah Rukh Khan’s best performance till date and deserves a standing ovation simply because of his effortless work; believe me I am not being opinionated and biased. You may quite forget that it is the country’s number one superstar in front of your eyes. He without doubt manages to make you believe that he suffers from Autism. The sequence where he first introduces himself to Kajol, the monologue in the church in Wilhelmina and the interaction with Jimmy Shergill outside his house, are astonishingly performed. Hats off to him.

Kajol is in top form again. She has played her part exactly as one should and has supported Shah Rukh’s character quite well. One cannot challenge this Jodi in any way. The chemistry, romance and friendship between the two is all subtle and mesmerising.

Others like Jimmy Shergill, Sonia Jehan, Zarina Wahab, Parvin Dabbas, Tanay Chheda (younger Khan) and Yuvaan Makaar (Kajol’s son) are all impressive. The rest of the cast, both Asian and American have all done justice to their roles. Thus the acting department is top notch.

Cinematography: Ravi Chandran has shot this film magnificently. He has made everything look beautiful and pleasing. The interior scenes in Borivali are notably lit well along with hurricane and rain sequences in America.

Music: Well there is not much that can be said about Shankar, Ehsaan, Loy’s music. They have done an okay job with the film and the 3 songs. However, the Khan theme that keeps playing several times in the film is superb as is Sajda. You would not stop humming it. The background score is also fine.

All the other departments including Editing have done the job well and are in sync with the film.

Key Points

  1. This film is not meant for those who look for hardcore entertainment in each scene. It is a sensible and straight forward serious film that principally caters to an international audience. The film’s graph, style and storytelling are perfectly fit for any successful Hollywood flick of this genre thus the conventional Indian audience might not completely identify with it.
  2. As I told my family 11 months back, SRK shall sweep all the top awards next year for his performance in MNIK. You shall be compelled to love him in this film. The film belongs to him and he has indeed raised the bar.
  3. For all those who like to draw comparisons, SRK’s performance is better than Aamir’s in 3 Idiots, simply because of the kind of role he plays, and that of Amitabh Bachchan’s in Paa, because as Mr. Bachchan himself said he could emote easily under the blanket of makeup whereas SRK did not have anything to hide his face under and could have got caught had he not performed this well.

I would not overrate this film as many have done by giving 5 on 5 but I give it 4/5 primarily because of the mindboggling performance by Shah Rukh and the honest and striving attempt to make serious cinema that has a larger audience cover. Catch it even if you are not a Shah Rukh fan because this one might just turn you into one.